Day: Apr 10, 2020

A day that rewrote History:

Ay, take the pieces of your life, string them together like a song; orchestrate- separate rights from wrong; forgive, blesseven if you do not feel like a blessing.

A day that begins to change me: there’s more than I can fully say in this Post. As quarantines connect different cities of our world, our family reaches a time when we learn from the mouth of our babes. Unable to have ‘regular service’s with all kinds and minds, today we too were just family, face to face with God. Last year today our precious visually challenged son was at his worst with seizures, (aggression from med side effects); today he is able to live an almost(96%?) normal life. Kitsy (with glasses) and he could barely stand each other in the same room: we each have thrown tantrums of all kinds I’ll say! There’s been tears, war, fear, all types of doctors; we’ve huddled, lost it, found new ways of reaching out to each other and those outside….

(Good Friday home service Haven with our kids, do join if you are led to, 38 minutes)


Yes, there’s been anxiety, some amt of damage, ach, yes scratch-bloodshed🤕😇 a teeny drop or two but frightening enough for a home that’s never had even raised voices…..well last night (Maundy Thursday, they both actually colour co-ordinated and did a few dance steps to Hollyn’s Alone. I’m startled at the power of prayers answered. What happens after prayers are answered, and hearts are healed? We can choose to forget. Or choose to remember, and pay tribute to the One who still intercedes for us….).

Today I know He isn’t turning away from our Planet. Maybe, the contrary! Miracles aren’t necessarily nice territory; it yells of both war, and love; of Peace in the midst of chaos, joy yes, against all odds. It’s been a year like that for our 5, but we’ve watched strangers walk in like angels and pray for us prayers that were answered. I stagger with awe at the Christ who cares that much for us in the B.C, & in the A.D.! We can’t wait to see how He’s going to touch you too. Stay blest.

Now unto Him who is able to keep you from falling…”


What did it feel like, Jesus?

detail of Communion 2
Oil, RN

Alone, all the way. No likes or approval. Not a single friend that deadly Friday. After all the miracles and love, everything died. No visitors in your cell, no long last hugs except the 40 lashes. Your last Song, a lone cry, “Father forgive them they know not what they do.”

Sometimes I feel You more than other days, days of alone. Then I thankyou for these times, here we are closest to the ‘disgrace of the Cross’. Here there is no applause, no data of glory. Just the loneliness. Here I meet You best, my Saviour, Friend. Here alone.

Our three!

Novel Contagion Love@ the Cross.

Two things here- stark contrasting Pair : a death instrument, and True Love’s pandemic Stare.

It’s a still, cool night here. Mild rain showers soften the air with the distinct scent of mingling trees outside. 2000 years ago now, Good Friday would dawn with historic consequences: there’d be a Cross with a Man on it, who whether we like it or not impacts humanity in ways we would never be able to extinguish.

And out of every wound,
a garden grew.
Oil painting, RN

I’m grateful for the Cross. It Changes me, constantly. It teaches me to never give up on each other, to never hold a hurt, to never be afraid of what can kill the body, it teaches me about the immorality of human souls, it teaches me to Love unconditionally. Teaches: present continuous tense: Learning is a long big trajectory curve, we are learning, leaning, standing tall, braving odds, wiping back tears of frustration, grief, aloneness

we are in a type of Gethesemane, we are judge and jury of the Times: how will we fare, who’s going to be crucified today? Ourself? Some of us do that; nah, we could never carry His Cross, ours’ are little baby Crosses(our sufferings) comparatively…

each time we watch our son go through a new ordeal, we also see the miles he’s done. Out there, are amazing people who’ve had losses this season and walk back out the door with a smile for the rest of their fellow survivors. I’ve seen Him in the faces of ‘ordinary folk’ who literally sacrifice time and energy for others. I do so little, I try but it’s not easy. Yet there are some very precious humans right now, braving odds, rioting against failure to support someone, people with guts of steel and hearts of pure gold. I see it in my daughters’ young faces, their strength, and ability to make us laugh again, or sing, dance, no matter the day, even pray. These are evidence for me that God is here. I believe that every moment on that Cross was God in dialogue with us. His last seven phrases ? Read here. We do not have a God who does not know what we go through:

Our daughter’s original, do listen if you’d like.

His cry to the Father: Why have you forsaken me? This one in particular holds me, holds me, holds me this season as our earth plunges into a time of the deepest hurt. Why?

Father into your hands I commit my spirit. Oh this Cry, it’s very statement calls me to a novel type of Father Love, free of humanness, of even gravity….

I must close, wrap this Post. Am sleepy like the disciples who could not wait a little longer with Him as He pled with them to, in the garden of Gethesemane where He would weep tears of blood.

I know He’s reading this, and that He reads you and me. There are very few things I really know, but this one nails home the truth of His kind of pandemic Love: No one else loves like This.

This season I’m holding on to what held me this far. As India goes into her most critical stage here of Covid, I must prepare to realise life is certified Short. There is no permanence here. We weren’t born with certificates of deathlessness; there’s more to Us than Malls and pretty parties. Pain is a sign of that. Grief is a mirror. Fear prowls but Love is the key, it turns the Lock in doors waiting to be opened. Sometimes we hear a Knock, a gentle Whisper…

Stay precious, stay blest, today, always.